ALDER & ROWEFamily Law

Mediation & Negotiated Resolutions

Resolving matters on your own terms, where possible.

Mediation is a structured process in which a neutral person helps people talk through a dispute and reach their own agreement. In family law it is used for property, support and parenting questions.

It can protect privacy, reduce cost and keep decisions with the people who know the family best. It is not right for every situation, and it does not replace legal advice.

We help clients decide when mediation is worth trying, prepare for it thoroughly, and review any agreement before it is signed.

Request a Consultation
Several people seated around a dark wooden table, one writing in a notebook with a pen.

Illustrative stock photograph.

Questions worth considering

  1. 01

    Two kinds of mediation

    In North Carolina, contested custody and visitation cases generally go through the court's Custody and Visitation Mediation Program unless a judge waives it for good cause. Money questions and other issues can be mediated privately by choice. Knowing which one you are in tells you what is required and what is optional.

  2. 02

    When it tends to work

    Mediation tends to work when both people will negotiate in good faith, information has been shared fairly and safety is not a concern. Then it can be faster and less adversarial than a hearing.

  3. 03

    When it may not fit

    A serious imbalance of power, a refusal to share financial information or safety concerns can make mediation a poor fit. Domestic violence is a recognized reason to ask a judge to waive court-ordered custody mediation. Honest advice includes saying when another path serves you better.

  4. 04

    The mediator is neutral

    The mediator does not represent either person or give either of them legal advice. Each person benefits from their own attorney before and during the process, and from a careful review of any agreement before signing.

How we may assist

  • We help you judge whether mediation suits your circumstances, and we say so plainly when it does not.

  • We prepare you for sessions: organizing financial information, clarifying priorities and thinking through the decisions you will face.

  • We attend with you or stay available between sessions, depending on what serves you best.

  • We review the terms before they are final, so the agreement you sign reflects what you actually agreed.

Common questions

The sessions themselves do not force anyone to accept terms. But terms you agree to are usually written into a binding agreement or court order, which is why legal review before signing matters.

No. The mediator is neutral and does not give legal advice to either person. Each person should have their own attorney, who may attend sessions or be consulted between them.

The matter then goes on through negotiation or the court, as it would have. Agreement on some points can still narrow what a judge has to decide.

Talk it through when you are ready.

Request a Consultation

The content of this website is for general information only and is not legal advice. Browsing this site or sending a form does not create an attorney-client relationship. This page is general information about North Carolina law, was not reviewed by a licensed attorney, and may be out of date. Confirm current rules and deadlines with an attorney licensed in North Carolina.